Say That Again?

The simple act of ordering coffee these days is akin to traveling in a foreign country, it would seem.

I was going on a mid-afternoon coffee run the other day while at work and my colleague asked me to pick something up for her, as well.

"A tall chai tea latte with skim milk." She said. "No wait, a tall non-fat chai. I think that's the proper way to ask for it."

"A chai latte though, right?" I said, writing it down.

"Well, I think the reference to 'non-fat' implies that it's creamy." She said.

Where do I sign up for the foreign language course in 'coffee-speak'?

I'm no better. Here's the verbal dance I do when placing my typical coffee order.

"A tall, extra hot mocha in a grande cup, with extra whip, please."

Between you and me, the coffee is really just a method of delivery for the whipped cream and provides me with an acceptable excuse to lap up the sweet dairy confection in the middle of my day, but I digress.

My coffee order is nothing compared to some that I've heard. Comprised of so many layers and nuances they are essentially complex ingredient lists for a gourmet recipe.

They're like signatures or fingerprints, unique to each individual. In fact, I happen to know that my local coffee joint knows its customers, not by name, but by their coffee order. There are worse ways to be known, I suppose.

Personally, I think the people, excuse me, baristas who interpret these requests are deserving of some form of public recognition, like winners of a particularly challenging spelling bee. I can hardly keep my own drink order straight, never mind having to deal with the pressure of several fired off to me at once while the customer taps an impatient finger on the counter (not me) and watches my every move (me).

For all the times I've ordered my favourite caffeinated concoction, I still find myself repeating it in my mind like a mantra while waiting in line, lest I stumble over it like a novice actor unsure of my lines in the crucial moment of delivery.

A day did finally arrive, however, when I was greeted at my preferred coffee haunt with a smile and the words, "The 'usual'?"

Top Ten Things I Would Love To Do If I Could Get Away With It or Why I Think I Might Be in the Midst of a Mid-Life Crisis

1. Skeet shoot clay pigeons from my balcony in the still of a quiet Sunday morning.

Pull! *Kaboom!*

Pull! *Kaboom!*

I would find this exceedingly therapeutic and the ensuing shocked reactions of my neighbours would give me no end of delight.

Until the police arrived, of course.

2. House a Rooster on my balcony.

I think he would be very effective in keeping my annual pigeon problem under control, not to mention the smile I would awaken with every morning upon hearing his enthusiastic greeting. Much better than a clock radio.

3. Bring my cat, Bear, to work with me.

This one doesn't need any explanation. Namaste.

4. Run away and join the circus.

Cirque du Soleil, to be specific. Even if my job was just to fetch coffee for the janitors.

My only dilemma would be what to do with Bear, if I was required to go 'on the road' with a touring troupe of performers and their janitorial staff.

What an outstanding experience that would be, though! My eyes are actually twinkling at the thought and my brain gears are turning.

5. Enjoy a chilled glass of champagne at my desk on an afternoon.

This might effectively address my stress issues, however, I sincerely doubt it would improve my productivity.

6. Tender my resignation, hand it to my boss with a smile, and walk out the door with a bounce in my step and nary a backward glance or a single care about how I'm going to pay my bills now that I'm unemployed.

Wow. I'm experiencing such an amazing lightening of my mood at the mere thought of this. Very interesting...*sigh*

7. Base Jump off the edge of a mountain to sail over a pristine valley.

I'd probably kill myself splat against some rock outcropping I didn't see coming because I was looking at sheep grazing off in the distance.

I'll bet it will have been extremely thrilling up to that point, though!

8. Buy all the artwork that speaks to me, without feeling a need to contemplate or budget for it, simply because it gives me enormous pleasure.

Alas, my bank account would give one horrified gasp and keel over dead, never to be revived again. Shortly thereafter, I would be hauled off to spend the remaining days of my life etching my initials in the stone walls of debtor's prison with my toenail. Add to this misery the irony of being denied access to my substantial art collection and you will feel the depth of pain that I would suffer at this most unfortunate turn of events.

9. Curl up in the middle of the Gallery on the couch and have an afternoon nap.

This would get me fired for sure. *grin*

It would just be for an hour, at most. You know, there are some companies that have nap rooms for their employees to use during the day. It's been proven to significantly improve productivity, employee moral, and retention.

I'm just sayin'.

I so need to find a way to work from home.

10. Give away or, preferably sell all of my furniture and start again from scratch.

Everything.

Every last stick.

Except my bed.

I do love my bed.

Downsize, downsize, declutter.

And, I want to change the main wall colour of my apartment. Ugh! I know! I can't believe I'm even considering repainting the same walls again!

Could this be the first whisperings of Spring Fever?!

I think so!

Workin' Out Wednesdays - A True Story

Once upon a time, not long ago, a young woman went to visit her Doctor for an annual check up. She had been going to this Doctor for years and they had a very relaxed, easy relationship.

In the course of their conversation, the Doctor recommended the woman drink eight 8 ounce glasses of water a day.

The young woman asked the Doctor if he drank eight 8 ounce glasses of water a day, to which he replied, "Are you kidding? Do you know how much water that is?!"

True story.

Silent Sunday - Cats are Nice.

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly,
"what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice."

Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

Today is Brought to You By The Letter "P"

Aging Gratefully gave me the letter "P" and I'm to come up with 10 words that start with it that are meaningful to me.

Let me first say that "P" is a great letter. Lover of words that I am, I found that the challenge for me lay, not in coming up with them, but rather in choosing the 10 that speak to me most.

Prayer. I believe in the power of prayer. I have experienced tangible occurrences in my life that can only be explained by the intercession of the supernatural, in response to prayer.

Pussycats. I love animals, however, in a room full of them, I do believe I would ultimately gravitate toward the one lone cat. Kindred spirits, we both seem to get an inordinate amount of pleasure out of cuddling or curling up to nap in a warm beam of sunshine. I admire their languid movements and confident air.

Purring. This one is obviously linked very closely to the previous one, however, it has merits of its own. To my ear, the sound of a cat purring is one of the most peaceful, relaxing things I can hear. It's an instant stress reducer for me and one that is difficult to hear and not feel buoyed by. In fact, there is some research that suggests that low vibrational frequencies, at low intensity, are therapeutic and that a cat's purr may actually have the ability to heal a number of physical ailments.

Pausing. Without the opportunity to simply pause and replenish my internal resources, anxiety builds and I feel a physical yearning to be quiet and still. It's an absolute necessity for me to maintain my equilibrium.

Presents. I love receiving presents. It could be in the form of a flower, a dinner out, a compliment genuinely bestowed, or a parcel in the mail. I love the feeling of being considered special, that someone has given the gift some thought and that it's meant for me alone.

Peace. This is a biggie for me. I seek a state of peace at all times. This one is central to who I am and how I like to operate in the world. It's not that I strive for anything on such a grand scale as World Peace, it's more a state of inner calm and stillness and a sense of being in harmony with others that I desire.

Pampering. Although I will often deny myself the things I long for, the truth is I'm a hedonist at heart. Massages, bubble baths, gourmet food and wine, limousine rides...I do love to be spoiled.

Petals. Flowers are an essential part of my environment. Whether it's an elegant orchid or a cheerful bouquet of daisies, they bring colour, perfume, and joy to my life. I do my best to have some kind of blossoming flower in my home at all times, no matter the season.

Pals. I cherish my friends and treasure each one as unique and valued. My friends support me through my deepest, darkest days and love me enough to tell me the harsh truths I need to hear, from time to time, in order to grow. They've been with me when I've cried and when I've celebrated and I'm grateful for each and every one who has graced my life with their presence.

Pictures. I love images that have been captured in photos or in a painted work of art. Each piece that I'm drawn to evokes a strong emotion for me and I derive a great deal of pleasure out of the artwork that I've chosen to surround myself with. What's been fun for me lately has been the inclusion of my own photographs among the collection of artwork I'm choosing to display in my home.

And, so ends my Top 10 list of words beginning with the letter "P".

If you'd like a letter of your own, let me know in the comments and I'll give you one.

I Have a Dream

I have a Dream.

It feels pretty Big and the thought of actually pursuing it, much less realizing it, is daunting, to say the least.

I have, nevertheless, decided to do exactly that.

This is a dream I've held for a great many years and the thought of reaching the end of my life without ever having realized it, has simply become too painful to contemplate.

...not that I plan on kicking the bucket any time soon.

I have, nevertheless, enlisted the aid of a Coach and have begun taking steps to make my Dream come true.
It's a big, personal risk for me to expose this tender part of my underbelly for all to see, however, I feel it's an important part of the process to take ownership of it and to be bold with my desire to make it happen.

As scary as it is for me, and frankly, it doesn't get much scarier than this, I want the Universe to know I'm serious about my intentions to make it happen.

My Dream is to move to the South of France and own my own country cottage with some land for a few animals (and a rooster, of course!) by my 50th birthday in March, 2011.

There are lots of obstacles, not the least of which are the immigration laws, and the language, and countless fears & doubts arise for me at the mere thought of my audacity.

I will be using this venue as a sounding board, from time to time, to vent my frustrations, ask for suggestions, support, and advice.

It's my sincere hope, however, that I will share many more victories with you.

So, I'm taking that giant leap of faith and stepping off into the great void...and I'm bringing you with me.

Do you have a dream you long to live?

"I tell you the truth,
if you have faith as small as a mustard seed,
you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there'
and it will move.
Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:20

Workin' Out Wednesdays

I've been eating a lot more of these lately, although I will admit this photo was taken before the pre-Ranch dressing soaking.

I'm happy to report that I got my VCR back from the repair shop, although I have yet to turned it on.


Smarta** Repairman: "Your machine is clean now, so don't use any crappy videos in it."

Me: "It's a VCR! All I have are crappy videos!"


I'm continuing to get up early to stretch and meditate. The stretching is helping, although I still feel very stiff and achey. I refuse to believe it's just age!

Basically, I'm pluggin' along, not making any huge gains, however, I'm maintaining a steady pace and will eventually add more cardio and ramp up my fitness regimen.

Not to rely on excuses, but...I do suffer from a mild form of S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and this lack of initiative and a general physical lethargy is pretty normal for me at this time of year. Low light levels play a big part in my degree of activity, so I actually think I'm doing alright by maintaining a positive attitude.

I'm in this for the long haul, so I'm not going to condemn myself for getting a slow start.

A Parallel World

Yesterday, while I was cleaning one of the sand paddocks that's situated next to a field, I noticed some movement out of the corner of my eye.

A little black mouse went running past me along a well worn path and disappeared into a hole.

I probably never would have noticed this little world co-existing next to my big one, if not for that chance sighting of the local resident.
The path extends quite far in both directions and I wouldn't be surprised if the little fellow isn't Miss Mousy herself, the one who lives under Button's stall. It certainly has the well kept look that I've come to associate with her tidy housekeeping habits.

In any event, it's quite a little engineering marvel and something of a super highway on a miniature scale. I can imagine all nature of fairies and sprites living in this environment.

The little holes are situated at regular intervals along the path and may serve as protective tunnels to avoid the hawks that hunt in the area, or they may actually lead to more complex warrens further underground.

It delighted and charmed me and I will be watching it for signs of life on future trips to the back pasture.

Silent Sunday - A Private Unrepeatable World

"We stand within an endless network of relationships.
We are all parts of one universe.
But within that universe,
we are each of us a single point of consciousness,
a unique event, a private, unrepeatable world."

Nathaniel Branden, Ph.D.

Uh Oh...

Well, the moment has finally arrived.

I'm experiencing serious memory problems on my computer that, among other things, is causing my programs to crash.

Not what someone with a compulsive blogging addiction wants to deal with.

I'm not sure why, everything's been working just fine for the past four years....*wry smile*

I'm beginning to sense that the Universe feels it's necessary to create a crisis situation for me before I'll make any changes to the status quo.

Just what I need...another life lesson.

With a little fancy footwork, I've been able to limp along so far, and I'm doing my best to control the rising panic and a relentless sense of impending doom.

However, I did want to give all my faithful friends the heads up in case I disappear from Blogger Land for a few days.

I'll just be over here tearing my hair out and muttering expletives at my computer screen.

As a last resort, I may have to post without accompanying photos *gasp* for a little while, until I get this all sorted out.

For me, dealing with computer issues is like being deposited in a foreign land where no one speaks the language, none of my comfort food exists, everybody looks funny, and I have to pee real bad.

Wish me luck!

Workout Wednesday - 12 Minutes

One of my favourite books is The New Fit or Fat by Covert Bailey.

In it, the author breaks down the fundamentals of how the body works in language that's easy to grasp and focuses on establishing a fitness routine, not a restrictive diet, to create a healthy body.

The truth is, I don't like exercise. It's hard work and it's boring.

So, I was delighted when I first read this about Aerobic Exercise on page 41:

A. Is steady, nonstop.
B. Lasts twelve minutes minimum.
C. Has a comfortable pace.
D. Uses the muscles of the lower body.

As he explains further in the chapter entitled "Why Twelve Minutes?", that's twelve minutes of aerobic exercise, in addition to the amount of time required to warm up to an aerobic state, which could be an additional 8 minutes, depending on the activity.

Still very do-able.

I can fit 20 minutes of exercise into my day without too much difficulty.

Here's where I am on my goals for the past week.

1. I took my VCR machine in for repair and the repairman made a few compulsory jokes about my ancient machine. Har! Har! It should be ready for me to pick up in a couple of days and I can begin to use my vast arsenal of workout videos.

2. I have consistently been stretching and meditating every morning, with the exception of two days. One because I had an early morning dental appointment and the other because it was a weekend and I got busy doing other (computer related) things as soon as I got up.

3. I have not made any major changes to my eating habits, yet. I'm resisting that for some reason. Perhaps because I don't like placing restrictions on myself that result in my feeling hungry or....well....restricted.

So...there haven't been any noticeable changes in my body yet, however, I feel good about the small steps I have made and I will continue to move forward, however snail like my progress may be.

It's my intention to begin to introduce some cardio activity into my routine, alternating every other day with the stretching and meditation.

I am Woman!

My main bathroom sink has been experiencing drainage issues for a while now, so I finally decided to tackle the problem head on.

By the way, my bathroom sink and counter always looks this sparkly clean and neat...hmmmm...I may be stretching the truth just a wee bit.

I gathered my tools together and prepared to go under.

It was an excellent opportunity to clean out the accumulation of outdated stuff that seems to collect under my sink, at the same time.
After wrestling with the screw clamps a bit, I finally got the u-joint off and...

*herk*

...the source of the problem was immediately apparent.

It's a good thing I have a strong stomach.

I've spared you the details, however, whatever slimy, mutant creature from hell was gestating in the plumbing asked me to say "hello".

I love it when I accomplish something good all by my self.

First the Good News...

The Good News is the snow is gone.

The Bad News is...the snow hasn't really gone so much as it has been transformed. Into a more liquid version of its original self.

It's also been raining non-stop for the past week or so.

What used to be pasture land is now a sizable lake.

These are views of the grass pastures at the stable where I work on Sunday afternoons. Fortunately, it's not as bad here as it is elsewhere, thank goodness, however, it's pretty soppy.

As far as the rest of the property is concerned, I have two words for you....

Mud.

Pit.

Silent Sunday - Dining Habits

"Any animal that routinely eats raw mice
isn't by nature a finicky eater."

Myrna M. Milani, D.V.M.

Unexpected Pleasure

We had an unexpected visitor at work yesterday.

One of my colleagues welcomed a kitten into their family recently and he brought her in for an unscheduled visit.

Curiosity personified, this little girl's eyes are as big and round as marbles

and she was determined to take everything in and explore every inch of her brand new environment.

Like a little bird, she would not stop moving. I was hard pressed to take a photo of her that wasn't a blur of motion.

One of the things I marvel at with felines is their ability to move so gracefully. Their body movements are so fluid they seem to flow like water.

Everyone at work knows that I love animals and I'm the unofficial ambassador on the rare occasions that a client brings a dog into the Gallery. They're like fur covered magnets to me and I just can't resist the pull to go over and say hello.

My mood immediately lifted when my colleague came around the corner with this kitten in his arms.

Such an unexpected joy at the end of my week.

Whisperings

I've never really paid much attention to dreams. A sound sleeper, I generally don't remember having dreamt at all when I awaken in the morning, although experts attest that we all do dream.

There was one occasion a few years ago, however, when my experience of a dream was so profound as to have left a lasting memory that remains vivid to this day.

I was in the midst of a separation and struggling with an agonizing decision of whether to proceed with a divorce. There were lots of extenuating circumstances that made the prospect of remaining in the marriage a difficult one, at best, and I continued to see-saw back & forth between the choices that were before me.

I was paralyzed by fear and indecision and was utterly unable to make a move.

One night, I dreamt that I was in an empty, windowless room in a high rise building. The door to the room was closed and I was standing in water.

As the water rapidly began to rise, I soon realized that I would die if I stayed where I was, yet I felt trapped and completely at the mercy of my situation.

When the water eventually reached the level of my chest, I began to panic and, as a last resort, finally reached out in an attempt to open the door. My only hope of survival was if someone on the other side heard my efforts to escape and offered help.

To my absolute surprise and relief, the door swung open easily and I was acutely struck by the realization that it had never actually been locked.

I had remained in that room, feeling trapped and threatened by my own false perceptions.

The door had always been open. I had only to walk through it to reach safety.

"So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains
And we never even know we have the key."

Already Gone
by The Eagles

Year of the Ox

Today is officially New Year's Day in the Chinese Zodiac.

There is a large Asian influence in the Pacific Northwest, particularly in the city where I live, so there will be plenty of celebrations, parades, and fireworks today.

2009 is the Year of the Ox and you have, before you, one of those steadfast characters in none other than Yours Truly.

Technically, this is my year.

Bywords for those born in the Year of the Ox are steadfast, reliable, hardworking, stubborn, resolute, dependable, organized, and ethical.

An Ox year foretells of honesty, candidness, and openness.

That will be refreshing, wouldn't you agree?

I generally view astrology with a healthy dose of skepticism, however, I have to admit, the descriptions that are available about the Ox are relatively accurate.

Of course, there are also a good number of things that I don't feel fit my personality or my way of operating in the world, so there you go.

There is one item of note worth mentioning though.

According to the people who understand these things, my perfect love match would be someone born in the Year of the Rooster.

That explains so much!

Gung Hay Fat Choy, everyone!

Workout Wednesday - Commitment

*gulp*

Yup, you read that right.

I used the "C" word.

Okay, here we go. I'm officially joining the Workout Wednesdays Team that Adventure Girl Wannabe started....just before Christmas (!!!!)

What? Is she crazy?!?.

A couple of caveats before I begin.

I don't weigh myself.

I measure instead.

It's been my humble opinion for some time now that weight is not an accurate indicator of fitness level.

As a woman, I'm subject to weird fluctuations in my weight, often caused by water retention. I've simply found that after busting my butt for a week, it's incredibly demoralizing to get on a scale and find out that I've actually gained weight!

Whaat!?

Furthermore, since muscle weighs more than fat and I will eventually be improving my muscle tone, my weight should, theoretically, go up, not down as I sculpt my body into a modern version of the Venus de Milo...but with arms.

Ergo, I find that keeping track of my measurements is a much more effective method for me to track my progress and keep my moral up.

Consequently, I don't own a scale and I have no idea how much I weigh. I consider that information interesting at best, but not relevant.

I also find I'm much more likely to stick with an exercise and diet routine if I allow myself the occasional treat. That can take the form of food or it can be a massage or a new piece of clothing. Otherwise, I feel too deprived and deprivation is no fun, people.

So, to begin:

My calendar age: 47

My Real Age: 44

My Lofty Goal:

- to reduce my waist measurement by at least 2 inches by exercising a minimum of 3 times per week.

First Steps:

- get VCR repaired (so I can put my extensive exercise video library to good use. It's still too snowy and cold to exercise outdoors. I gave up my gym membership years ago and have no intention of acquiring a new one.)

- get up early at least 3 times a week to stretch. (I'm starting slowly and I'm still so incredibly stiff from hauling all those buckets of water!).

- Use Weight Watchers guidelines to determine appropriate meal serving sizes and to assist in establishing a balanced diet.

- Limit my consumption of high caloric coffee drinks to a maximum of 3 per week, with a goal to reducing that figure even further. (ie. Peppermint Mocha Twists from Starbucks.)

- Meditate at least 3 times a week to reduce stress* and focus my mind on my goals and intentions.

*Studies have shown that stress can increase the likelihood of weight gain around the middle. Belly fat has also been shown to be a major component in such health issues as diabetes, high blood pressure, and some cancers, to name just three.

Risk factors increase with a waist size over 30 inches for women and 40 inches for men.

My Teammates...so far.
There's always room for more!

Heidi
Dana
Kaci
Jani
Becky
Cynthia
Scrappygirl
Linda

My Favourite Things - Wrist Warmers

In this installment of My Favourite Things, I'm highlighting an item that I love for a couple of different reasons.

First of all, I like anything that keeps me warm...except hot flashes.

I'm not sure why, however, I'm having a hard time welcoming hot flashes into my life. They're just so....well...hot!

Anyway, these lovely little wrist warmers are amazing.

Designed to be worn under long sleeved sweaters or jackets, the concept is a simple one. Warm the blood that's near the surface of the skin on the wrist and the body will, in turn, be warmed.
It does work.

Unless I'm a prime example of the placebo effect in action.

In any event, I feel warmer and that's all that matters.

The other thing I like about these wrist warmers, in particular, is the array of rich, vibrant colours they come in.
These wrist warmers are available at Urbanity, a store in my area, and they offer exquisite sweaters, skirts, and a variety of other Norwegian woolen knits in fabulous colours.

Unfortunately, the larger items do not currently fit in my budget, in spite of my desire to own several of them, so the wrist warmers offer me a little foot in the door and a way to add a splash of warm colour to my wardrobe.

White Stuff

In the words of my first bunny love, Thumper:

"What's all a that white stuff?"

We're being buried in the stuff and, as pretty as it is, it's also damn cold, people!

I've had about all of it that I can take.

There have been predictions and promises of rain in the forecast.

Heaven forbid! To have reached a point in my life where I'm actually looking forward to rain, tells you the low to which I have sunk.

Well, I'm off to begin the long, tentative trip into work....

Silent Sunday - Ego

"Whenever I climb, I'm followed by a dog named Ego."

Friedrich Nietzche

Focus

Geoffroy's Cat
Status: Endangered*

Today will be a day spent in quiet contemplation and focused thought.

The last part of 2008 sent me spiraling out of control in nearly every area of my life. I'm beginning to see a pattern developing that has me going a bit mental at this time of year, in spite of my best efforts to avoid having a meltdown.

They say acknowledging a problem is an important first step to making a change. Perhaps I'll be better prepared next year.

In any event, today it's my intention to take steps toward renewing my zen state of mind, realigning my karma and getting back on track.


(*To learn more about the Geoffrey's Cat and other endangered species, and how you can help, visit Mountain View Conservation & Breeding Society.)

Good Riddance!

Good riddance, 2008, you b*tch.

*grin*

Like any relationship, the year we spent together was not without its good times. However, I've gotta say, you really turned on me at the end.

I'm still reeling from the a** kicking you gave me.

So, I'm not giving you any more of my valuable time or attention.

Today is a new day, a fresh start, and an opportunity for me to continue undaunted on my path to pursuing my dreams.

As my good friend, Linda, says, "Its time to Cowgirl up!"